Nellie_J

Hey everyone, I am sorry I haven't posted lately. I started a new job a month ago at a grocery store, and I love it. I volunteered at a food pantry for a long time, and the neat thing about that is the skills i utilized while packing food and doing paperwork, and talking to people, I use now and actually get paid to do it!

On the adoption front, I havent heard from the AP's for a couple of months, or rather no serious conversations. I got a text, thats about it. It kind of bothers me, but I understand juggling 4 kids and a life is hard enough sometimes, especially when one child of them is a teenage girl.

My oldest son, is a tween going through some major life crisis issues at the moment, and all i can think about is if he will get through his teenage years less scarred then I was. I spent my teenage years doing the stuff that gave me the lessons to impart to my readers, in other words, when I was supposed to be learning to drive and becoming independent, I was pregnant, raising a child alone, and completely dependent on everyone around me just to simply survive.

I wouldn't take the experiences away, or my son for a moment though. There are days in his pre teen angst that i think of hearing his small voice and remember when he was small and I could still pick him up, and hold him. When he would listen to nite nite stories, and be happy snuggling with his mama watching spiderman for the fifty millionth time that day.

I have been thinking about him alot lately, mostly to keep myself from falling apart and doing what I can to be there for him, in the midst of the new and awesome things in my life. I never thought it would be possible to be where I am right now. I have a stable place (imperfect but a good place to call home for now) to live, I am finally learning to drive (ready to take my test--told you, I was too busy taking care of a kid and being pregnant and such when i was teenager, what fun that was) and have a boyfriend who is super supportive and loving. He is so good to me. we have been dating a week shy of 2 months, and I have to say I have the best friend a girl could ask for.

Yeah, life could be better but for someone like me, who's had some rough spots more then good ones, I feel pretty good. Alright, off to do the laundry, and clean house, or play games on facebook, either way have a great day!